While I was shopping for pants one day in JC Penny's, I found a little paper book that looked quite intimidating from the outside. There was a nasty-looking man with a snarling face and angry eyes. Why should I describe it when I can just show it? Here ya go:

It was called, clearly, "Gun Slinger." I thought this was intriguing enough to pick up, and since Penny's had only been open for ten minutes, I thought it was left behind and perfect for me to grab up and read. Turns out, this mini comic book was some sort of propaganda for some sort of religious softcore zealots. It told quite the story too. I clipped some excerpts for you because the literature surely did impress me and make me long for a job in media because of the way messages are sent and recieved.

The story starts with a dark gun slinger coming to town. He came to meet with the barkeep, who has been lacking in business, along with gamblers and hookers, ever since the preacher came to town. This was because the single preacher achieved the daunting task of helping all the people find religion. See below.

So the gun slinger holds true and goes to church on Sunday to kill the preacher. This wasn't as easy as he thought though, because as the preacher preached, he listened and felt the word of God touch him. Immediately he gave up on his sins and decided to go for a life of good. Of course that works in God's law, but with man's law you don't get off so easy. The gun slinger had to be killed. See below again.

There's the preacher (far right). He knows the execution isn't totally acceptable by God's standards, but he couldn't stop it, right? And we also see the sheriff off to the left with a big smile. Now the preacher gives a thing about how the sheriff should repent too, after all he just killed the gun slinger. But our sheriff says, "If anyone can get into heaven, it's me!" Sure enough--only three hours later--he was attacked by snakes, killed, and went to hell.

So what's the moral of our story here? Is it that Christian zealots are really scary? Is it that no one is truly righteous? Or is it that we should all turn to God and repent for all of our sins every three hours just in case snakes come along? Nah, it's more that I've run out of quality content. But hey--you read this far, sucker.