the moment of truth...

Perhaps you didn't get the memo.

We're famous.

In light of loyal fans repeatedly visiting this website, and my updates of it, coupled with a vast number of supporters from around the world (seriously), we have surpassed 10,000 visitors. I'm not sure how many students are out there studying web design or internet marketing or whatever, but that's not a fake number, it's really 10,000. And yes, it's true that no other website in history has ever had that many. 

When the counter flipped the phone started ringing off the hook. Reporters from around the world wanted to talk to me for breaking an internet record by appealing to so many demographics. It was a shock and an honor to be a media darling, but I hope you enjoyed seeing me around the TV all last week. Don't worry though I didn't forget who made all this possible either. Thanks to you visitors and all of your referrals around and around the internet. 

Oh wait, you didn't see me on CNN? 
I was on Larry King. 
You don't watch that anyway.

And as Paula Zahn or Wolf Blitzer stood outside my door and interviewed me live via satellite to TVs around the world and a secret feed to outer space. It was a very touching moment, but I maintained professionalism and gave the camera crew a tour of my creative space. In addition, the crews took footage of roaches and poor building conditions to sell to a local news station as a behind the scenes style exposé.

After that I had to hitch a ride to the Today Show, where I had one of those brief 2-minute interviews with Katie Couric. Afterwards she propositioned me in a sexual manner, to which I had to explain that I was taken by a sexy lady back in Wilkes-Barre. She didn't take it well. Luckily, my interview was live, so it still made the show.

What didn't make the show was my appearance on the Late Show with David Letterman. Apparently it's not funny when men flash their breasts to Dave either. The producers said the joke had been done to death and that I would be axed. Oh well. I still got a few words in the monologue!

Protestors greeted me on the streets of New York claiming that I had defamed their prophets and religious leaders by having the counter turn over and the world not ending. Though I assured them that it was a good thing that they were still living. They contested.

Anyway, in the end, we made  the grade kids and the website will keep going strong and I'll be waiting for visitor number 100,000. Keep on stopping by, and you can rest assured I'll keep making up fake stories like this one. Thanks for all of your support though!