About a month ago, I joined a little online service called MySpace.com. I had no idea what it was, what I got out of it, or what to expect. In the midst of all of these questions, I decided that the best way to find answers was to jump in head first. I knew a few people already on this site, so I knew that it couldn't kill me to try it out-- after all Tim Hoy, Alisha Turull, and the radio station haven't died yet. So I signed up. And what did I get? A whole crap-load of social curiosities. Interestingly enough, it seems that no matter who you are or what our differences may be, we'll always have some things in common. Before we examine those similarities, let's talk about what MySpace is.

Imagine, if you will, a giant room. In this giant room there are thousands of people coming and going. There are also sections that are delineated in different areas of the room where people have things in common. Some people have multiple things in common with multiple people, so they have to spread around their time in these different areas, like school, work, hobbies, etc. You walk in and see all of these people, and you may be intimidated and stay close with the three or four kids you know in the room, or you may spread out and mingle to meet new people. Regardless of what you choose, no one cares or pushes you any where. Now take that room and digitize it through cables and waves until it includes the segment of shut-ins and homebounds, and now you have MySpace.

So what are the perks? Well, there's pretty much nothing. Assuming you're interested in meeting new people, you'll have some fun, but if you're jumping in for answers, it's pretty lame. As I joined, I got an angry IM from Marla Moses asking why I didn't invite her to be my friend. In essence, I had a more direct line of communication with a friend asking me why she was not included in a less-personal, less-direct system of communication. And why shouldn't she? When she finally became my friend, we both had bigger numbers on our friends list--we both looked extra-popular.

With popularity comes responsibility though. You can meet tons of people who are represented with pictures of "hot" women or "ripped" dudes. You can meet smart-looking people or really dumb-looking people. Some people have Photoshop and jazz up their pictures and some can't even scan and crop them correctly. The responsibility of ethics in today's new media would require you to use a representative picture of who you are and not too much less. Mine for example shows a hokey moron:

Now that seems representative, right? A lot of people don't seem to use the right pictures for themselves, but who are we to judge? Maybe they use images of what they would like to be, and isn't that what meeting new people is all about? Projecting a false image?

You will find some normal people with appropriate pictures though. These pictures all have recurring tendencies in them and we'll take a look at that next (Alisha was kind enough to provide us with her samples for the top tree photo types... without permission):

	The Arm Photo In using a webcam or digital camera, many people don't go through the trouble of finding out what one funny-looking button on most cameras is. It's the auto-shot button that allows you to get into a normal position and get your armpit out of the picture by giving you about ten seconds to move into position and get comfortable. Most of my pictures are done with this setting.
	The Laying Picture Most people have a picture of themselves laying down. I had one way back when, but that's because you can only have yourself in so many ways before you dip into the world of mediocrity. Why take a picture of yourself laying down? I'm not too sure, but you have to have one!
	The Look Away You know how candid and casual you can look when you're looking at something else? Capture that spontaneity by intentionally looking at a wall or something when you snap a picture. This covers your casual and easy-going side.
	The Finger Picture Every guy has to have a picture of them giving the camera the finger. How else will we know you're cool? Many people mis-use the finger anymore and it's really lost its luster. Here we have Shawn using it in a punk type setting. I gotta let him get away with this one because that's who he is. When you get some kid with glasses and a lame haircut, then the value of the finger drops a lot.
	The Away and Down This image of Holly shows us a number of things, like she's got hair, teeth, and other human qualities. That's nothing special, but what we also get is the view of a busy woman who is strapped for time so much that she just snaps a picture without even looking away from the computer. This is a good shot for busy people and those who love the computer.

Now after you have all of that, you start to make friends. You need at least one of the following before you're a full-fledged member of MySpace. Don't worry guys, I just made it last week.

	Friend with a Cowboy Hat This one is a must, and it was the last one I got. This is Kevin Costa from High School. He found me and I was lucky enough to have the final piece to my MySpace puzzle.
	Friend in a Bikini Multiples of these is common for most guys on MySpace. Though you have to wonder how many of the bikini friends are actually guys to begin with. I just got this role filled when Michele Berrios from High School also found me.
	A Band I have a couple that actually ask to be my friend instead of the other way around. Maybe I'm THAT famous. For this picture I chose fictional band The Beets. Yes, that means you can represent an obscure fictional group of people. I'm still looking for the VR Troopers...
	A Solo Singer Songwriter Thank God for Paul coming to fill this role in my group. The presence of a developing artist shows that you're sensitive to the needs of people starting out and also a fan of music. And if you're not a fan of music, why breathe?
	A Guy in Drag Alright, this isn't required-- but it helps you get some street-cred if you accept all people. And Dave SWEARS it was a one-time thing for a joke.
	A Smart Friend Emma wins the smart friend prize. Only smart people would get a picture taken with a sculpture.
	A Famous Person Who Could Care Less A lot of people have Dane Cook for this one. I decided to spice it up and go for the oft-offensive Stephen Lynch. Lord that man's funny. A famous person in your friend list shows that you could leave a message for a famous person some time if you wanted to-- and that means you're connected.

Once you have one of each of those, you become an official MySpace person. It's a strange feeling to know that you're somehow connected with thousands of people who don't care what you do or who you are, but on occasion you'll get to re-meet some old friends and share a caring line or two that make you feel better for catching up on old times. After all, isn't life all about caring anyway? If you can show someone from way back when that you actually care what they're up to, then you really accomplish a lot. And what's great about MySpace is that you can ignore the ones you don't care about.