NASA, your priorities are crooked

At some point this week NASA lost track with their new fancy-pants rover on Mars called Spirit. This seems to be entirely unacceptable, but what could be called more unacceptable is that MSNBC actually put Bill Nye the Science Guy on TV to talk about it. I like Bill Nye and all, but c'mon.... we need experts, not PBS stars. Still, you have to feel some sympathy for good ol' NASA; they always seem to be trying their damnedest to get things going on up in space. We got several space stations and trips to the moon to show for ourselves, but in reality NASA's gotta deliver us some new ground-breaking stuff to impress the public so we don't get pissed about a billion dollar space program losing touch with a piece of equipment that's too far away to send a service man (because they charge a whole lot anyway). Now understand, I do believe space exploration is important and everything, but I don't think this type of error is easily excusable. 

What could've happened to the Mars rover though? What would be an acceptable answer that could keep the nation from flipping out over such a glitch? Today I read that Bill Nye explained the Rover to be "sick" but not dead. First of all, thank God it's not dead, but secondly-- it's a machine, they don't get sick. That's just a bulls--t answer altogether. I have some more possible answers as to what could've happened; I bet you would never have thought of these possible problems either.

I think we all may have ignored the reality that aliens could very well have eaten Spirit. Now, the twenty minutes of data that came in today was sent from the digestive track of your run of the mill reptilian alien who has a penchant for yummy metal parts and fluffy side cushions. I can't blame the aliens, after all those cushiony landing pads could be a marshmallow if you're hungry enough. Also, I don't know if you've seen the pictures from Mars, but it doesn't look like there is too much food on there. How do you think we got the idea to eat corn and stuff? Somebody just got so hungry that they had to try something. The Martians are in the same boat. We can't blame them for getting a hunger bug and chomping up some spacecraft.

There's also a chance that the remote sensor got blocked-- I know I hate when that happens. I get so tired and I just wanna sit, but there's a videotape or book in front of the TV or stereo. Then I have to get up and move it. But before I do, you can be damn sure I'll try to bounce that remote signal off the walls, ceiling, or any possible mirrors. It's just gotta be done when you're that tired. Now NASA's got a bit of a bigger problem, because while I have to get up and move three feet to move whatever is blocking the sensor, they have a whole lot farther to go.

Related to the remote sensor, what if the batteries on ol' Spirit died? Now I thought about this one long and hard. I thought, "No, it can't be battery powered, but what else could power it? There can't be outlets on Mars, and even if there are, what if they're like those damn European outlets? Spirit would blow up big time. It's gotta be batteries." And I hope, for America's sake that it's that Energizer E² technology, because my remote batteries died, but they were Rayovac.

In the end, I think--regardless of what happened--we're all on the same page on this matter. You guys watch TV, you know what I'm talking about... Instead of developing Tempur-Pedic mattress technology, NASA needs to get their priorities straight and start moving on shuttle or rocket or space rover technology. Though, in actuality, the NASA mattress stuff really does help keep our astronauts safe when they hit all those G-forces when they head out of the atmosphere. Blah-biddy-blah, whatever-- now let's move on, I think you mastered softness, now lets find some of the probably billions on billions of life forms out there.