Super Bowl XLI: Eagles v. Chiefs
By: Pete Phillips
January 17, 2007

good luck in the big game, marcus

Every January I realize that one Sunday is going to have reruns and bad movies on. I hear people talk about pig-skins and tropical locations. It usually takes this long before I realize that the Super Bowl is coming up. I'm really quite oblivious to big things. American Idol premiered too? Who knew?

After last year's Seahawk's victory under the guidance of Rick Mirer, it's no wonder the Eagle's have made it into Super Bowl XLI (you may recognize that those two points are, in fact, unrelated). With dedicated fans that blindly support your efforts with chants of spelling bees, how can the Eagles not deliver? I happened to be in West Deptford last week and the pride was rampant. Church was filled with green jerseys and the priest cheered for the team. "E-A-G-L-E-S, Eagles," he shouted. My "J-E-S-U-S, Jesus," was practically inaudible.

Luckily they'll be facing the... Chiefs-- sure. The dynamic duo of Joe Montana and Marcus Allen can certainly do no wrong when it comes to play. They'll bring pride to all Native Americans around the country as they shoot their arrowheads into the patriotic Eagles. It's almost a metaphor for reclaiming a homeland stolen through diseased blankets and Christianity. Both teams are fighting for much more than the Stanley Cup this year!

Some people will be watching another game (this one apparently broadcast on television), between the Chicago Bears and New Orleans Saints. Many others have turned to conspiracy theories about the match-up. Chicago has been pretty popular recently, what with Kanye West and all. And New Orleans hasn't been heard from in ages, so this should really turn the spotlight to them for once.

One maintenance guy here at work, in talking about the game, said, "Of course everybody's gonna be rooting for the Saints." I assume he meant because Rickey Jackson deserves a Super Bowl ring before he retires. After all, he doesn't have many years left in him.

Of course you have the other side of the audience who tune in for commercials. They have very little to look forward to since the past few years have been pretty awful. This year, advertisers have figured out yet another way to trick consumers into working for the man for free. You can get your own homemade Doritos ad on during the Super Bowl. People have to vote for it and all, but you have friends, they'll vote for you. With a pay-off like getting your commercial on TV, why would you need payment? You're such a sucker.

Whether it's a Kansas City Chief's victory, your big 15-second break, or the Chicago Bears playing on behalf of Polar Bears across the world, I hope you get something out of Super Bowl Sunday. I'd be more specific, but I don't know what date it is. I'm allowed one missing/wrong fact per article, right?